Alien
It's spring in Osaka, and the sun is warm on my face as I lean against a pillar at Kiyono's station, waiting for my train. I hear something and ignore it - can't be bothered trying to understand Nihongo all the time. Then I hear it again. It sounds like English. In fact, it is English. Someone nearby me is saying 'alien' quite clearly. I look around and spot a group of young guys, half-grinning, half-scowling at me. I look at them. They look back at me, insouciant. I stare at them. They stare back at me and say alien, alien, alien, just to make their point. I stare for a while longer, and then decide not to say anything because my quick temper has nearly gotten me killed at least once before. Even though I really, really want to. Alien? Alien?? Aliens are small and green and lethal and force the world to unite against them. Fuck me. I thought one of the benefits of being Western was an immunity to racism. Don't you want to be me, not hate me? The Japanese army nearly worked my grandfather to death in the slave camps of Burma 60 years ago but he survived and I'm alive as a result. Alien, indeed.
I got angrier as the train refused to arrive, leaving me next to the idiots, still grinning at me with fixed faces and daring me to Make Something Of It. Fucking bogans. Bogans are the same around the world, no matter what the language. Man. I thought one of the blessings of globalisation was that the underclass was being outsourced to India, leaving stupid and aggressive former-blue collar Westerners to die out. Maybe next generation. (Ouch. Snob-by)
As always, I thought up a variety of childish comebacks well after the event. This proved difficult, given my basic grasp of Japanese and the relative dearth of expletives in this polite culture, but I worked at it and if it happens tomorrow, I have these sentences ready in my arsenal:
- Nan desu ka, baka? (What is it, idiot?)
- Hai, kuso atama? (Yes, shit-head?). I'm not sure if that translates but I'm sure they'd understand and subsequently kill me.
After my initial burst of anger subsided, I had another blinding flash of inspiration. The perfect opportunity, once in a lifetime, to say 'Take me to your leader'. The joke may not translate though, what with the intergalactic gulf between us and all.
---
It's spring in Osaka, and the sun is warm on my face as I lean against a pillar at Kiyono's station, waiting for my train. I hear something and ignore it - can't be bothered trying to understand Nihongo all the time. Then I hear it again. It sounds like English. In fact, it is English. Someone nearby me is saying 'alien' quite clearly. I look around and spot a group of young guys, half-grinning, half-scowling at me. I look at them. They look back at me, insouciant. I stare at them. They stare back at me and say alien, alien, alien, just to make their point. I stare for a while longer, and then decide not to say anything because my quick temper has nearly gotten me killed at least once before. Even though I really, really want to. Alien? Alien?? Aliens are small and green and lethal and force the world to unite against them. Fuck me. I thought one of the benefits of being Western was an immunity to racism. Don't you want to be me, not hate me? The Japanese army nearly worked my grandfather to death in the slave camps of Burma 60 years ago but he survived and I'm alive as a result. Alien, indeed.
I got angrier as the train refused to arrive, leaving me next to the idiots, still grinning at me with fixed faces and daring me to Make Something Of It. Fucking bogans. Bogans are the same around the world, no matter what the language. Man. I thought one of the blessings of globalisation was that the underclass was being outsourced to India, leaving stupid and aggressive former-blue collar Westerners to die out. Maybe next generation. (Ouch. Snob-by)
As always, I thought up a variety of childish comebacks well after the event. This proved difficult, given my basic grasp of Japanese and the relative dearth of expletives in this polite culture, but I worked at it and if it happens tomorrow, I have these sentences ready in my arsenal:
- Nan desu ka, baka? (What is it, idiot?)
- Hai, kuso atama? (Yes, shit-head?). I'm not sure if that translates but I'm sure they'd understand and subsequently kill me.
After my initial burst of anger subsided, I had another blinding flash of inspiration. The perfect opportunity, once in a lifetime, to say 'Take me to your leader'. The joke may not translate though, what with the intergalactic gulf between us and all.
---
posted by Doug @ 5/16/2005 08:53:00 pm
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